Funny! As my mind clears it's interesting how things not realized come to mind. Perhaps it was better that the following didn't since I am so apposed to being considered a "Friend with Benefits".

In a phone conversation last Monday my buddy informed me that as far as he was concerned; "in the future we can work on being friends, go out to dinner, you pay your way, I pay mine, but the sex part won't be anymore". Yes, these are his words!

So, am I to assume that for the past four years I was nothing more than a "Friend with Benefits" and nothing more? I mean, we can work on being friends, but since you treated me badly I'm going to withhold sex ... do have this right or not?

I tell ya! The more I think about this, in so many ways I feel so cheap. According to his statement, to think that he genuinely cared about me seems to be a bit of a myth. Now I wonder how our relationship would have turned out had I not put out? In this context, it wouldn't have been at all.

For now, I'm just going to let this slide cause if I dwell on it, it will send me into orbit! I literally hate the "Friends with Benefits" label ... hate it, hate it, hate it! I don't give my body to someone just for their amusement or convenience. I am not a whore!

Anyway, I'm just going to chalk this one up to him being angry. Why? Because I choose to believe that somewhere deep down in his heart he does/did love me. Maybe not in the traditional sense, which is ok with me, nevertheless in his own way he does/did loves/loved me.

Until Tomorrow ...