Missing Link-Part III
To recap. In part one I wondered if where I am was really where I want to be to which I concluded that physically I was in a better place with just one flaw … lack of companionship. I would give my eye tooth to be able to walk in the door to open arms and a friendly welcome home hug.
In part two I talked about the kind of companionship I desired … one of acceptance, honesty and openness. In other wards, I’m looking for a relationship that brings together two very different individuals and within that inner action form a bond of absolute friendship and companionship. Because for me, companionship is love personified! There is no greater love!
The relationship I’m in is truly hard to describe. One thing I can say is that it isn’t your typical stereo type relationship, which in itself isn’t all that bad. As for the relationship itself, well, it has its limitations and restrictions which at times causes me to truly wonder if being involved, let alone in love, is where I need or want to be.
For starters, we meet on line. He was in a shattered relationship from which there was no return. I was rebounding from the loss of my partner. When we began chatting I figured that he was full of hot air and that he had no real intentions of ever meeting. But I was wrong! We meet and at first sight I feel for the man. He, on the other hand, wasn’t in the same frame of mind. Nevertheless, knowing and understanding his situation, I still feel head over heals for the man.
In the beginning there were a lot of restrictions, nonetheless we saw each other when we could. And for about six months we were in and out of each other’s lives on a regular basis. Then, after finding out that he stood me up in order to hang out with another guy I decided to stop seeing him and for the next six months we had no contact with each other. During this time I went on with my life. When I was on line and saw him I ignored him. Then one day he decided to flag me asking if he could see me. My initial reaction was, no! I wasn’t going to be disappointed or disrespected. But being that I was still very much in love with him I decided to give it another chance.
For months following our relationship was emotionally rocky … to the point where we almost went our own ways. Out of the woodwork came accusations from those whom he casually hung out with, including those whom he didn't know. The accusations were demeaning and extremely hurtful, even to the point of being emotionally painful. In listening to the comments he was portrayed as someone who was an emotional user and one that couldn’t be trusted. I tell you, I really don’t know how we muddled through this period cause I, as well as he, was ready to walk … it was emotionally horrifying and I have to admit this experience caused me to have misgivings about him and our relationship. Yes, our fist two years was emotionally toxic. Then, things changed … drastically changed!
To recap. In part one I wondered if where I am was really where I want to be to which I concluded that physically I was in a better place with just one flaw … lack of companionship. I would give my eye tooth to be able to walk in the door to open arms and a friendly welcome home hug.
In part two I talked about the kind of companionship I desired … one of acceptance, honesty and openness. In other wards, I’m looking for a relationship that brings together two very different individuals and within that inner action form a bond of absolute friendship and companionship. Because for me, companionship is love personified! There is no greater love!
The relationship I’m in is truly hard to describe. One thing I can say is that it isn’t your typical stereo type relationship, which in itself isn’t all that bad. As for the relationship itself, well, it has its limitations and restrictions which at times causes me to truly wonder if being involved, let alone in love, is where I need or want to be.
For starters, we meet on line. He was in a shattered relationship from which there was no return. I was rebounding from the loss of my partner. When we began chatting I figured that he was full of hot air and that he had no real intentions of ever meeting. But I was wrong! We meet and at first sight I feel for the man. He, on the other hand, wasn’t in the same frame of mind. Nevertheless, knowing and understanding his situation, I still feel head over heals for the man.
In the beginning there were a lot of restrictions, nonetheless we saw each other when we could. And for about six months we were in and out of each other’s lives on a regular basis. Then, after finding out that he stood me up in order to hang out with another guy I decided to stop seeing him and for the next six months we had no contact with each other. During this time I went on with my life. When I was on line and saw him I ignored him. Then one day he decided to flag me asking if he could see me. My initial reaction was, no! I wasn’t going to be disappointed or disrespected. But being that I was still very much in love with him I decided to give it another chance.
For months following our relationship was emotionally rocky … to the point where we almost went our own ways. Out of the woodwork came accusations from those whom he casually hung out with, including those whom he didn't know. The accusations were demeaning and extremely hurtful, even to the point of being emotionally painful. In listening to the comments he was portrayed as someone who was an emotional user and one that couldn’t be trusted. I tell you, I really don’t know how we muddled through this period cause I, as well as he, was ready to walk … it was emotionally horrifying and I have to admit this experience caused me to have misgivings about him and our relationship. Yes, our fist two years was emotionally toxic. Then, things changed … drastically changed!
Oh yes, the trials and tribulations of a relationship. Here's the thing, if you make it past the first two years, you got it made. Most would not as much as consider hanging around at the slightest sign of drama. Count your blessings! The worst is behind you.
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