Last couple of days I've felt emotionally lost. And in thinking about it, I've pinpointed the issue that's been nipping at me. I'm sick and tired of going in and out of doctor's offices. And I feel bad that J'me has to ride this journey out with me. After all, he's got his own medical issues, add mine and he's got his plate full. Don't get me wrong, I so appreciate that I don't have to do the doctor hope alone ... it's nice to have a shoulder to lean on and share my frustrations with. In so many ways, I'm a lucky man!

I know that in time my doctor visits and test will slow down to a trickle. Like J'me said; "Since I'm starting over and getting medically re-established, it takes time". He's right! Most of my medical issues are critical in that they require seeing specialists: i.e. neurosurgeon, cardiologist, vascular surgeon, urologist, and pain management. Tell ya, getting up in years, it's a bitch! Thank goodness I have good health insurance, otherwise, I probably be dead by now.

Thus far, my heart and bladder are doing fine. My heart, though not in excellent condition, is functioning at a satisfactory level. It could be better, but my last heart cath showed no major blockages. Beginning next week I'll begin cardio rehab where they will monitor my heart along with exercises. God only know how much I need to exercise! As for my bladder, come June I'll be cancer free for two years.

Once everything settles down, the only two major issues that I need to focus on; my lower back and my triple A. My lower back is so messed up. There is no doubt I will require surgery. Meanwhile, we're trying to avoid the inevitable. I've been to physical therapy, but its been halted. Now I'm having spinal injections ... round two is coming up in May. And last but not least, my triple A ... oh boy! Right now it's 3.7 silly centimeters. Now this I can't mess around with! In order to keep it from enlarging, worst, bursting ... smoking, I NEED TO QUIT!

Oh yes, I forgot about my pain management. Today I switched doctors. Glad I did! My last doctor, Antebi, I wasn't comfortable with him and his office. Furthermore, I certainly would not allow his staff to do invasive procedures on me. His office just felt nasty and dirty. So after doing some thinking and looking, we decided to find another pain management doctor, which we did. His name is Doctor Singh. Not only is his specialty pain management, he's also a neurologist ... it's like getting two in one. Yay! Anyway, today was my first visit and we're happy with him.

Like I stated earlier; I'm a lucky man! J'me has been more than I ever expected. Totally a God send! And life with him has been, without question, excellent! Yeah, we have our moments, but I wouldn't triad those moments for anything. I am truly blessed!

Until tomorrow ...